10 Things My Mother Taught Me

1. To value family traditions and to pass things on to the next generation - like good family stories, old photos, and the recipe for Grannie's Christmas eggnog. Also the family silver.

2. To plant iris - never too deep, never too shallow and not until July. It seems to work that way.

3. To drink tea - hot or cold, with lemon or cream (never both!) and not all those herb beverages - real English tea - Earl Gray, English (or Irish) breakfast, darjeeling, or assam.

4. To swim. A strong swimmer herself, she saved my life once in the ocean and made it her mission to be sure that I would not need her the next time.

5. "It's only hair." And, no matter how bad the cut or curl, it will grow out! I've needed that one a lot recently.

6. Grammar matters. She was right about that. In this world where good grammar is going the way of Fat Sam, there are still plenty of us hanging onto the old rules, and trying to keep the world a more pleasant place for conversation... and writing.

7. To cook - well, not so well. Mother was an unadventurous cook and kept things simple. Spaghetti was a pretty fancy meal for her. Someday I want to take some classes and become more adventurous and move outside my small comfort zone.

8. To upholster. She would strip a chair down and dive into re-doing it without anything but guts. "It's all in the process," she'd say. "Just start at the back and work to the front, then work your way back." She was right. It works.

9. To wear good (by that she meant "not holey") underwear. You might be in an accident and wouldn't want the folks at the emergency room to see you had on old, worn underwear. I choose to interpret that to include lace as much as possible.

10. To always have some money put away. Mother (like her mother) was adamant about this. I've had a bank account since I was 10 and always a little put aside. She always made sure I had at least one nice piece of jewelry.... in case I needed to sell it for quick cash.

What did your mother teach you?

A very happy Mother's Day to all!

Do You Live In NYC?

If you do... can you help a bit at Prospect Park next week? or perhaps the week after?

A wonderful New York blogger has begged and cajoled the city parks department into scheduling a clean-up day for Prospect Park. Apparently there are large areas where people meet for sexual purposes and leave their... um, trash ... behind. Tools and gloves will be provided.

Please read her post here for the details, and if you can help let her know. Her email is halfway down the post. Thanks.

The first water lily of the season - April 25,2011.

I'm Fascinated!

For the past 400 years we Yanks have been trying to cast off the parts of our English heritage that we don't like and hold close those things that we do - cheeky lot we are. For example, we definitely don't like English rule, but we think the monarchy is pretty cool. We don't like tax on tea, but we love brides of future kings. And my newest "love" is fascinator hats!

Once upon a time here in the colonies there were millinery shops where one could buy a hat that fit. They were sold in small, medium and large, as well as by actual size - I think they were inches, but don't really remember. Then came the one-size-fits-all movement and I quit wearing a hat. With an undersize head [to balance my oversize hips, I guess] I look like a little girl playing dress-up whenever I put on a hat!

And now along come the Duchess of Cambridge [aka Kate] and all her upper class English friends - to say nothing of European royalty - in their fascinators. The wedding was full of them, and I think we need to jump on that bandwagon on this side of the pond.

I love the small "boats" balanced oh-so-carefully on top of the head, or the wonderful flowers and bows perched precariously on the side ready to take flight. I was so relieved to learn that the Queen has officially made it acceptable to wear a fascinator to Royal Ascot as an alternative to the huge hats that were once required. With a younger, more hip, era beginning I suspect there will be flights of fancy in the smaller head gear this year, too. Can't you just see Pippa Middleton's flowered topper at a garden party or summer wedding here in the States?

If I were African American lady I would have a closet full of lovely big "crowns" to wear to church on Sunday. Many ladies I know can rival the Queen in that category, but the fascinator is so much more fun. A few flowers here, a (big) bow there and a bit whimsy veil ... what more could a girl want to look special and a bit sexy? I thought Posh Beckham managed to pull this one off nicely for the wedding, especially since she is noticeably pregnant and was dressed so conservatively. The long "tails" gave it a bit of oomph, even in the dark color.



I'm willing to get out the hot glue gun or a handful of finishing nails to attach one to my head - although I am told that combs, clips and headbands will do the trick quite well. I think this one would be lovely - about a third as large. It just shows that even a princess can't get away with just anything, and that sometimes one's stylist misses the mark.





I particularly like this one that Camilla, oops! the Duchess of Cornwall, is wearing. I think she looks years younger than in the huge picture hats that she so often chooses, and that she actually did wear to the wedding. This is so youthful and fresh. It may be the one she wore to her own wedding, altho I think that one was larger and had a lot of gold in it.


And I think these two are particularly interesting.

Tara Palmer-Tompkinson (left) was named by many as one of the best dressed ladies at the wedding, while Princess Eugenie (right) was widely dubbed as one of the worst. I loved Tara's dress and hat, but thought that the matching gloves and bag were a bit too much. Princess Eugenie's dress was awful - mostly because it was too short and didn't fit at all! - but it's the same hat - slightly different color and with flowers to match her dress. While the hat has been criticized, too, I thought it was the best part of her look.

So, what's a girl to do? We're going to an afternoon wedding in July. With the right dress, I might need to find a little fascinator of my very own. What about you? Want to give it a try and bring this fun fashion to the colonies?

Best Wishes!

to Wills and Kate.

It's all very exciting and I sure would love to be in London for the big day, even if my invitation did get lost in the mail.

I well remember getting up very early to see Charles and Di tie the knot, and would love to do it again tomorrow, but have to be at a client's office at 5:30, so will miss all the good parts. Thank goodness for the DVR.

Meanwhile I will trust you all to watch for all the details and to raise a glass for me at the appropriate times. Best of luck, you two, I think you might need it!